so i found my senior year prom dress in the closet at my parents house tonight. i put it on and surprisingly it fits. its a little more snug than 9 years ago, but i can get it on. i remember LOVING this dress.
of all the dances of my 4 years of high school, i never once had the same dress as any one else. and would you know it that the one year i buy a fancy dress from a store on park ave. that i absolutely love loVE LOVE, some other bitch that didn’t even go to my school has the same dress!?!?!
also, i think i can smell some remnants of sweaty B.O. on the dress. i probably never washed the it because i never wore it again after that night. it always seemed too special to ever wear again. so it is a little weird/gross to smell that smell of old me, but it makes me nostalgic to think back to old me.
what was i like in high school? what would i tell my 17 year old self today? i can honestly say that the only major regret i would tell myself to DO is to go visit henry in thailand. there’s not much in my life i regret. but that is something that i will never let myself live down.
i dont know if i even thought about myself at 27 back then. i still feel really young sometimes. like i am still 17. but i have a career, a house, a live-in boyfriend. sometimes, i still feel like i need to ask permission. and i just wondered right now, while i just typed that line, will i ever not feel that way? and i answered quickly in my head: maybe if i ever have a child i will not feel like i need to ask permission anymore, because i’ll be the one granting it then.